Fandom: The Avengers (2012)
Pairing: Bruce Banner/Everybody (basically)
Rating: PG-13 for language and implied situations
Warning: casual polyamory ahoy! And it's post-canon.
Written for the avengers kinkmeme.
Prompt: "Bruce is so mild and unassuming, that the rest of the team can't help falling for his quiet charm. Bruce isn't exactly sure how he keeps falling into bed with these handsome, muscle-y people."
It was on the morning when he woke up sandwiched between Natasha Romanov and Clint Barton (Natasha snored, Clint didn't) in a giant bed in a suite in Avengers Tower in Manhattan that Bruce Banner (Doctor, Hulk, Esq.) finally admitted that maybe - maybe - something might have been going on.
Okay, so maybe his mouth and dick ached pleasantly and his legs were fantastically limp and even the other guy was - relatively - quiet given the total lack of adrenaline left after a night spent with two handsome, well-muscled people who'd worked him over torturously slowly. So maybe whatever was going on wasn't bad, exactly.
It was still weird.
Clint and Natasha woke up at the same time and went off on some other SHIELD mission - Clint clapped him on the back, Natasha kissed his cheek - and he found himself nursing coffee in the 44th-floor kitchen an hour later, getting more weirded out by the second.
"You're all plotting to keep me mellow," he said to Pepper Potts. Even being weirded out, he couldn't really inject that much accusation into the statement. She made really good coffee. "With sex."
"Well, post-coital endorphins are known for their calming effects," Pepper said mildly. She didn't even look up from her e-mail, where she was probably also gently scolding some Fortune 500 CEO somewhere and making him like it.
"But considering the serious risks involved in getting me to a post-coital state in the first place--"
"Also, all of us really like you. Don't question it," Pepper said, leaving the kitchen with a kiss on the forehead for Bruce and a peck on the lips for Tony, who was passing her on the way in. She tossed over her shoulder an unsettling, "Behave, Tony. He's figured it out."
Tony smirked and opened his mouth.
"You're constructing a Twilight Zone around me, aren't you," Bruce barreled in before Stark could say whatever smart-ass thing he was cooking up. "You're all taking on the pity case and minimizing his liabilities while you're at it. Keep me happy and mellow, make me feel," his throat closed, "feel wanted, and I'm less of a risk to the rest of the team--"
"Now you're reaching," Tony said, breaking Bruce's train of thought. "I know you're angry all the time, but does it always have to come with the criminally low self-esteem? I'm the only one here allowed one of those, okay."
Bruce stared at Tony. It wasn't that long ago that he'd seen Pepper naked, and Tony naked next to her, and the memory in conjunction with last night made it really difficult not to picture Tony naked again. The other guy grumbled.
"Pepper likes you. Clint and Natasha - obviously - like you. Cap likes you. I like you. Thor likes you. Even frigging Nick Fury likes you, don't tell him I told you that."
"So I'm team mascot."
"Are you complaining about the benefits?" Tony rolled his eyes. "JARVIS, we got any of that Thai takeout left over?"
"Miss Potts directed me to warm it up before she left. It's currently in the microwave, sir."
"You don't understand. None of you understand what I could really do if--"
"God, I'm a lucky man," Tony said happily, going to retrieve the pad thai from the microwave. "Listen, Banner, we all like you and some of us think your mild-mannered-scientist-on-the-constant-e
Exit Tony Stark stage right, which left Bruce poleaxed in the kitchen while Steve fucking Rogers walked in.
Steve was sweaty and in workout clothes. Tony smacked him on the ass on his way out.
"Um," Bruce said.
"He's right, you know," Captain America said, and winked.